The Wet Crystal

We were running late this morning. I say "this" morning like running late is something out of the ordinary. It's not. But, I digress. Brad had taken a shower and I was in the process of getting Lucy dressed. Getting her dressed usually isn't a problem but lately, changing her diaper is a problem. She hates it. She screams, she twists, she screams, she flails and this morning, she kicked like a mule.

The mule reared back and kicked violently at whatever was within her range. Unfortunately, her soaking wet diaper from the night was in my hand and well within said range. What happened was something I've never seen before. Her tiny little foot connected with the diaper and the next thing I know, it's snowing. No...it's slush...no...it's...

*ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww*

Pee crystals!

::gag::

Did you hear what I said? PEE. CRYSTALS. No, no, wait...wet. pee. crystals. It was a blizzard of wet pee crystals!

She stopped crying instantly. This might have something to do with the screech that I let out. I made the unfortunate mistake of yelling to Brad to "get a towel because Lucy just kicked her diaper and there is shit everywhere." In hindsight, "shit" was not the appropriate word to use because you know what Brad was expecting to find. But no, it's just an inch of pee crystals on me, the hardwood, the blanket, the towel, Lucy's hair, Lucy's face, Lucy's body, Lucy's clean clothes. Sigh.

I've seen these pee gemstones before of course. When the girls were little, I would sometimes see a crystal or two in their diaper at changing time. They are nothing to worry about (says the mom who was covered in them this morning).  The crystals are actually a product of the chemical that makes diapers “super-absorbent:”  sodium polyacrylate.  These polymer beads, which absorb 200-300 times their weight in water, leak out of the paper fluff when diapers are very full or if there is a little tear in the lining.

I'm not opposed to the bling in the diaper, but why didn't anyone ever tell me that a violent shake/kick would release the gems and send them flying all over the room? That information, my dear diaper companies, would have been uber-helpful.

This is a snow cone without a cone as seen through Toddler Vision (TV)